A Day of Worship

Last night we had the second of four lessons for Family Night about the Resurrection. I had put pieces of paper in a plastic Easter egg that had St. John 20 written on it. Vanessa, Eric, Joseph, and Rex each got one since they are the kids in the family that can read. I hid them in the kitchen before we started Family Night. After the prayer and the song, the kids went into the kitchen to find their egg. After they read their scripture, we talked about how Mary must have felt to see Jesus standing there outside of the sepluchre and how just three days earlier she had just seen him beaten and hanging on the cross. It was very touching to hear that when Mary sat there weeping and Jesus spoke to her that she immediately recognized his voice. She must have been stunned and overwhelmed. I can't wait for Family Night next week to hear once again how the apostles reacted to Jesus's resurrection.

 After our Family Night, Jared and I headed 80 minutes south to see a Jazz game. We were given the tickets by a co-worker of Jared's. What a stark contrast to attend that Jazz game after our wonderful lesson at home. It was difficult to enjoy the game, and in fact, I didn't try very hard to enjoy it. It was nice to be with Jared together without the distractions and interruptions of the kids. I used to love the Jazz and would have loved going to a game, but it just doesn't have the thrill it once had. Don't get me wrong here, I am just fine not being that into the Jazz. I love my new life and the greater joy I have found.

We are in a day of worship. Joseph Smith was given the restored Church of Jesus Christ. We each have the privilege to study what Joseph Smith has restored and judge for ourselves what we think of it. Having Family Night each Monday night is one of the things we do to show our belief in Christ's restored church. I love that I can show what I think of Christ everyday as I worship Him and follow His prophets.

Vanessa

We went to Vanessa's concert today at Utah State University. Wow! It was amazing! Bridgerland School is the one who put it together. It was all of the best kids from Ogden to Preston, Idaho. It sounded like a concert you would go to for college age students. Vanessa is exhausted from the practices over in Logan, 30 minutes away. Jared's Mom, 92 year old Grandma Harris, and sweet Marianne drove up from Salt Lake to be there. Jared had forgotten to tell them exactly what day it was, so they went up to Logan last night, Jared's dad Doug, his brother Grayson and his fiance with them, but the concert wasn't last night. But, Linda drove up again today to be there for Vanessa. What a special day it was! We went to lunch at Texas Roadhouse as everyone was starving. Now the kids are out playing night games with the neighbors. I am sitting here on the couch waiting for them to come home with an ice bag on my hurt foot. I think I'm going to have to go the doctors for it because I'm not healing on my own. The original injury is from 12 months ago. I must have re-injured it because a couple of weeks ago something happened and now I have to hobble around. It has been a journey of injuries and healing now going on 8 years. I just can't seem to heal.

Co-Dependency

I was just looking through my blog stats, which I have never done until today.  It was interesting to me that a post I wrote in April 2010 got 157 page view hits on it.  Here is the link to it.  The post is all about me being a needy child.  The next closest post only had 20 page view hits.  Wow!  That is pretty remarkable to me.  What was so interesting about that particular post, I wonder?

I have no idea who has read that post 157 times because I don't have a widget that shows me who is coming to my blog and who isn't.  I have done that on purpose because I don't want anyone to think I am watching to see if they come to my blog.  I like people to feel like they can come here and their presence will be anonymous.

As a follow up to that post, I am happy to report that I have come a long way from being a co-dependent daughter, wife, friend, etc.

It is strange to think about where I've been and how far I've come.  Life feels normal to me now and I have so much happiness.  I feel like a part of my Patriarchal blessing has been fulfilled which states that 'As you keep the commandments, your life will be a joy and a pleasure.'  I feel so grateful that the Lord got to me and He helped me change my life.  He has done so much for me and helped me in ways that I can't possibly explain.

I am a testimony that people can and do change.  I have changed so much and I know with the Lord's help, I can change more to be who He wants me to be.  I am happy to allow Him to do this to me.  I am gaining more trust in His care, something that has been incredibly hard for me to do.  But, something inside of me yearns to trust Him more.  Something beckons me to feel after Him and search out His love for me.  Something inside of me wants to tell everyone I know of His love.

So my co-dependency is a faded memory.  Strangely, I feel like it could become a living, breathing part of my life again if I let it, but I don't.  I fell down on my right bum cheek 6 years ago on the pavement and the Lord has seen fit to not heal me from the injuries I sustained that day.  I attribute my spiritual growth to this.  I have been virtually physically immovable since that fall.  I sit a large portion of every day because of the pain I have in my right foot.  The Lord has taught me that through physical immovability, I could learn spiritual immovability.  And that is the exact lesson that I have needed to learn so badly, for I had consistently lowered my standards and consistently offended Heavenly Father in the process.  So, I am grateful for my physical immovability for the lessons it has taught me.  I wish I could have learned some other way, but...  And I suppose I need the constant reminder, ie constant pain in my foot, to never lower my standards again.  I gratefully accept it if that is the case because I have gone to every doctor, chiropractor, neurosurgeon, etc with no cure available to me.

So, I'm off to bed.  Church starts for us at 08:30 am, bright and early!  Good night everyone!

Weary Not

This is from Mark chapter 13.  It impressed me because I've been asleep as to things spiritual most all of my life and I still fight the weary feelings that come over me.  I loved the song sung at President Monson's birthday celebration in August of 2012 called Weary Not.  It has helped me so much to remember that song every time I find that the challenges and temptations of life are dragging me down and I am tempted to throw in the towel and go back to living the way I used to.  Weary Not.

32 ¶But of that ^aday and that hour knoweth no man, no, not the angels which are in heaven, neither the Son, but the Father.

 33 Take ye heed, ^awatch and ^bpray: for ye know not when the time is.

 34 For the Son of man is as a man taking a far journey, who left his house, and gave ^aauthority to his servants, and to every man his work, and commanded the porter to watch.

 35 Watch ye therefore: for ye know not when the master of the house cometh, at even, or at midnight, or at the cockcrowing, or in the morning:

 36 Lest coming suddenly he find you ^asleeping.

 37 And what I say unto you I say unto all, Watch.

Just Stuff

I love my kids!  They are the best!  They drive me crazy sometimes, yes, but I love them so much.

Rex, who is 7, just learned how to make himself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.  Now he can make two things for himself, cereal and peanut butter and jelly.  This is a big day for him and me.  He is now less dependent on me and he doesn't have to only eat cereal when he gets hungry in between meals.

Vanessa is practicing her little heart out for her concert, which by the way, all of you are invited to attend.  Her concert is on Saturday March 18th, 1pm, at Kent Concert Hall, Utah State University campus, east corner of campus.  She came home from school yesterday, after staying after school for 90 minutes to practice with her orchestra teacher, in tears.  She said how hard the piece of music is and that her friend, who is a second chair violinist, not first chair like she is, has a way easier piece to learn.  I told her how much more advanced of a player she is than her friend and that her friend is probably going home in tears to her mother because her piece of music is too hard for her to learn.  That calmed Vanessa down and we were able to talk about the details of the performance and the practices which are over in Logan, 25 minutes away.

Jared is on a snowmobiling trip to Wyoming right now with his brothers, uncle Cordell, and cousins.  This will be a 3 day trip for him.  I talked to him this morning and he said his brothers and him stayed up until 4am last night chatting.  He said that Grayson, his 28 year old brother told them his conversion story.  Grayson has been away from the Church for the last 12 years 'ish.'  He recently got engaged and we are so happy for him.

Other than that, life is business as usual. 

Disturbed And Beautiful

I read this from Ezra Taft Benson this morning and wanted to post it because I agree with it:

'Our prayers should be meaningful and pertinent. Do not use the same phrases at each prayer. Each of us would become disturbed if a friend said the same few words to us each day, treated the conversation as a chore, and could hardly wait to finish it in order to turn on the TV and forget us.' - Ezra Taft Benson

In other news, Vanessa gave a talk on Individual Worth last night at her Young Women's New Beginnings night.  I helped her fine tune her talk.  But, it was when she gave the talk that I was able to hear how she really felt about what she was saying.  She got emotional and teary as she spoke of Jesus Christ and of the love she feels from her Heavenly Father.  She spoke of the talent that her Heavenly Father has given her with the violin.  She told how she loves to hear how other's have felt of Heavenly Father's love for them through her music too and that it is beautiful to her.  I don't get to see this side of Vanessa.  In the normal course of the day, we don't get spiritual.  At family home evening she doesn't show us her feelings.  I have heard her bare her testimony at family night, but she didn't get emotional. 

Heavenly Father is so kind to us.  He is so patient.  He is firm, but loving.  I love how He hasn't given up on me.  I love how He hasn't given up on any of us.  He wants us to do our best and is always reaching out to us to lift us from where we are.  I love Him.

Room For Jesus

'Only greater consecration will cure ambivalence and casualness in any of us! As already noted, the tutoring challenges arising from increased consecration may be severe but reflect the divine mercy necessary to induce further consecration. (See Hel. 12:3.) If we have grown soft, hard times may be necessary. Deprivation may prepare us for further consecration, though we shudder at the thought. If we are too easily contented, God may administer a dose of divine discontent. His long-suffering thus becomes very necessary to maximize our agency and development. But He is not an indulgent Father.

We “cannot bear all things now,” but the Lord “will lead [us] along,” as we “give place” in our thoughts and schedules and “give away” our sins, which are the only ways we can begin to make room to receive all that God can give us. (D&C 78:18; D&C 50:4; Alma 32:27, 28; Alma 22:18.)

Each of us is an innkeeper who decides if there is room for Jesus!

Consecration is the only surrender which is also a victory. It brings release from the raucous, overpopulated cell block of selfishness and emancipation from the dark prison of pride.'

I love that each of us is an innkeeper who decides if there is room for Jesus.  This is a marvelous talk given by Neal A. Maxwell.  

Laboring

In my morning study of a talk given in General Conference 1987, I read this by Robert D. Hales, who was then Presiding Bishop in the church:

May the prayer of Alma also be our prayer:

“O Lord, wilt thou comfort my soul, and give unto me success, and also my fellow laborers who are with me. …

“Wilt thou grant unto them that they may have strength, that they may bear their afflictions which shall come upon them. …

“O Lord, wilt thou grant unto us that we may have success in bringing them again unto thee in Christ.

“Behold, O Lord, their souls are precious, and many of them are our brethren; therefore, give unto us, O Lord, power and wisdom that we may bring these, our brethren, again unto thee” (Alma 31:32–35).

“We love you; we miss you; we need you. Please come back.” Come back to go to the temple, enter into the covenants, and receive the ordinances of eternal salvation.


It got me to thinking about how to reach out to lost souls and who is in my circle of influence who needs reaching out to.  I have learned that it is sacred work to reach out and in that process we strengthen our own spiritual underpinnings.

It is one of my favorite things in the scriptures to read others' prayers.  

It is also interesting to note that the title of this post is laboring.  When you think of a woman who is laboring to bring a new life into this world, it is work indeed.  It is hard.  It requires focus and determination.  But it is worth every effort because the new life that is brought into the world is so innocent and beautiful!

The Kids

Valentines Day was nice.  When the kids got home from school, Jared and I had filled little sacks with candy and treats and had hidden them around the house.  The kids had to go searching like a treasure hunt for their sack.  Once they found a sack, they had to look on the outside of the sack to see if was their name on it.  Joseph found 4 of the sacks.  It was really fun.

Vanessa is in 8th grade and they had a dance over at the school.  Vanessa got asked to dance by a boy that she really likes.  She was pretty happy about that.  The girls in our neighborhood love and look up to her.  She never has a hard time finding a friend to do something with.  She is 13 years 9 months old.

Bruce is becoming more independent and able to entertain himself and play by himself better recently.  He is 3 and a half years old.

Rex has been arguing more with us lately.  He wants his way and has been having a hard time just obeying.  He loves healthy foods and is easy to please.  He has a large group of friends at school and in our neighborhood.  Kids love him.  He is 7 years old.

Joseph is a very helpful child.  He is motivated by rewards.  He likes to tell his side to every situation, and wants to be right even when he isn't right.  There aren't many kids his age in our neighborhood that are his age.  He is 10 years 7 months old.

Eric is in the famous grumpy pre-pubescence stage.  He is very sensitive to how his body looks and how he is different than a lot of the other kids at his school.  He has a lot friends too.  He is 12 years 7 months old.

                                               
About 18 months ago!  The whole group!

Vanessa is such a sweetheart.

Vanessa and Eric are good friends.  They are 14 months apart.

Pretzel

Soft Pretzels

1 1/2 cups warm water
1 T sugar
2 tsp. kosher salt
1 T yeast
22 ounces all-purpose flour, approximately 4 1/2 cups

2 c. boiling water

1/4 C. baking soda

4 ounces butter, melted

Combine the water, sugar, salt, yeast, and flour in a stand mixer and beat until they form a soft, not-too-sticky dough. Knead the dough for 5 minutes in the mixer or by hand. [We always do the last couple minutes by hand; I love to knead and so do ALL the children, who each have to have their turns]. Then let it rise for an hour. [The KAF recipe says just to let it "rest" for 30 minutes, but we went ahead with the longer rise.]

*NOTE: Some recipes have you immerse the pretzels in a boiling water/baking soda solution for a minute or two, and others use just hot water---but the KAF recipe is the only one I've seen that actually calls for a "soak" in the soda bath---not boiling, just lukewarm.  I've used the boiling-water-dip in the past, but with kids helping, the soaking option seemed easier, so we gave that a try. And I was very pleased with the results! So I think I'll use that method from now on.

While the dough is rising, prepare the soda bath. Mix 2 cups boiling water with 1/4 c baking soda, stirring until the soda is totally (or almost totally) dissolved. Set the mixture aside to cool to lukewarm (or cooler). Then pour it into a cake pan or other shallow pan.

When the dough is puffy, divide it into pieces and roll out each piece into a long snake. Let the "snake" rest for 5 minutes (to let the gluten relax) and then twist it into a pretzel shape.

In batches of 6-7 at a time (however many you can fit in the soda-bath pan), put the shaped pretzels into the soda bath. Spoon the solution over them so their tops and bottoms are covered, then let them sit for 2 minutes. Remove them from the bath, place them on a greased baking sheet [they say use parchment paper, but that didn't work well at ALL for us---it stuck to their bottoms terribly!], and sprinkle them with kosher salt. Let them rest for 10 minutes, and then bake them at 450 for 8-9 minutes or until golden brown.

When the pretzels come out of the oven, brush them immediately with melted butter. Then eat them while warm. They are SO GOOD!

Doesn't this look like a yummy recipe?  I am going to try it!  I got it from this website:  

http://nielsonschool.blogspot.com/

Dad's Heart Attack

My Dad is doing alright.  He is weak and will need some rehab.  I am so glad that he didn't die because there is some repair work that needs to happen in our relationship and I would have been VERY sad not to have had the chance to do that.

In his own words in his recent email letter to our family:

'The story about me goes: Last Sunday, I lived through something that I should have died from. After 7 years of dealing with two stage four cancer tumors and now a massive heart attack that has left me with 3/4 of a heart that works, I am well adjusted to my own mortality. You don't need to tippy toe around me. We can joke about me and discuss it any time you want. Just don't ask me how I am doing. I mean I am a double stage four cancer guy who just had a massive heart attack. I am doing terrible as far as normal is concerned. But, I am having a ball in most other ways..

Here is my history leading up to the MI (Myocardial Infarction or heart attack). Three or four years ago when my total cholesterol was in the 240 range, triglycerides 350, I felt a heavy feeling, not actual pain, around my heart in my chest after eating burger king hamburgers. And, I still love them. This feeling was broadened to include brownies made with butter, beef roast, five or six broiled pieces of chicken breast which I loved the spices on them and ice cream by the 1/2 gallon. Any fat filled food gave me that feeling. The heavy feeling would go away after an hour or so and if I drank a few glasses of water.

One week ago Friday, as I was shoveling snow, I couldn't lift the shovel like normal. There was pain around the heart which I discounted and drank some water and took an aspirin. The pain went away. Then a few hours later, it came back.  Both arms ached like bad. The same through Saturday, every 5-6 hours an episode of pain that didn't go away for 30 minutes or so.. Sunday morning at 0500 in my little bathroom the pain was so severe and unrelenting that I knew it wasn't going away. I yelled to Myra, "Call 911." She panicked and said, "Are you sure? I don't know how." I yelled  back, "Figure it out and hurry." The pain was crushing in the upper chest. I started sweating on the forehead and neck. I walked to the living room and collapsed on the sofa. The EMT team arrived in a few minutes, two ambulances and a fire truck and we sped away to the hospital. 

They ran an EKG which was normal and drew cardiac blood tests which were normal. This was a huge puzzle as I was moaning in very severe pain. Finally, an older doctor came to me and said, There is a little spot on the last EKG that shouldn't be there. I FEEL as if you are having a heart attack. If it is what I think it is you need a stent right away. We are sending you directly to the front of the line in the cardiac catheter lab. (There were four other old men snow shovellers who were being worked up for stents). On the table upstairs the doctor came to me and said, "Mr Taylor, you are having a heart attack as we speak. We will insert the stent right now." They ran the tube through the femoral artery starting in the groin up to the center of the heart, dissolved the clot with blood thinners, placed the double stents and finally relief of the horrible pain. The rest is boring. The crisis was resolved. I haven't felt any pain since and I don't expect I will. That old heavy feeling is also gone. I believe I am more healthy than I have been in many years since my veins are clear. I hope my heart will recover to at least 90% which they said might happen after several months.'

Love and Chili

Jared has become quite the cook.  He loves to make us chili.  He loves experimenting with different spices.  The chili is delicious!  The kids don't like it as much as the canned stuff, but I do.

I feel so blessed!  Heavenly Father has been so good to our family.  We have made several changes over the last few years and they have seriously tried our marriage.  But, we have come through it and are not only just surviving this life together as a married couple, we are thriving in it.  Jared continues to find dignity and respect at his new job.  And we both continue to find out what a marriage filled with love is all about.

Heart Attack

My Dad had a heart attack on Sunday, and has been in the hospital for the last 3 days.  I had Jared text my Mom and ask how he is doing.  She said he has been through a lot and the doctors said that he is weak and shouldn't have visitors like us right now.  He is 71 years old.

Violin and Basketball

Vanessa is on to her next item in her bucket list of things she wants done.  She got braces a couple of weeks ago.  The orthodontist told her she'll have them on for about 16 months.  She only has them on the top because the bottom teeth are fine.  Hopefully, by putting them only on the top it won't ruin her bite, thereby needing to put them on the bottom as well.

Vanessa is also working on a violin piece by Lindsey Stirling.  She is working on perfecting it to perform at an audition on February 9th.  If she gets chosen, she'll get to be part of an orchestra that will perform somewhere, I'm not sure where though.  She is getting really good at the Lindsey Stirling piece called Crystallize.

Eric is playing basketball at the church with the Deacons Quorum.  The Bishopric asked Jared to be the coach.  It is fun watching Eric play.  He isn't very good, but he has had hardly any exposure to basketball.

Birth

We have spent the last several weeks catching one sickness after another.  It is our Stake Conference today and we are missing it because of fevers and tummy bugs.  We thought Rex had strep throat again, after his bout of it 2 months ago, but his fever went down and he is looking better today.

I have been thinking a lot lately about having another child.  It has been on my mind more and more lately and since I just turned 38, I realize that I'm getting closer and closer to that window closing on me forever.  As I've thought of bringing children into this world, it occurs to me more and more that there is a connection between the desire of bringing children into this world and allowing new life to come into my heart.  The Lord has worked a wonderful work in my life and he continues to do so.  But, like birth control or the barriers we can place in order to prevent conception, we can also place barriers in our lives that prevent the Lord from being able to put new life into us.

I'm studying about this right now and learning that I don't trust the Lord as much as I should.  I think of my own children and it offends me when they don't trust me.  I can imagine how the Lord feels when I don't trust Him.

Furthermore, as I have been yearning to trust Heavenly Father more, I have been thinking of the birth process and how I haven't trusted that process.  I have been studying midwifery and considering the idea of going to school to become a midwife.

Honor And Respect

I love this:

“... What really matters is that he will love you,that he will respect you, that he will honor you, that he will be absolutely true to you, that he will give you the freedom of expression and let you fly in the development of your own talents. He is not going to be perfect, but if he is kind and thoughtful, if he knows how to work and earn a living, if he is honest and full of faith, the chances are you will not go wrong, that you will be immensely happy.” Gordon B. Hinckley

I want to add to this that if you don't have this type of man in your life, hope in not always lost.  With love and encouragement, the men in our lives can change.  They don't always choose to change, and I love what President Faust has said about that.

'What, then, might be “just cause” for breaking the covenants of marriage? Over a lifetime of dealing with human problems, I have struggled to understand what might be considered “just cause” for breaking of covenants. I confess I do not claim the wisdom or authority to definitively state what is “just cause.” Only the parties to the marriage can determine this. They must bear the responsibility for the train of consequences which inevitably follow if these covenants are not honored. In my opinion, “just cause” should be nothing less serious than a prolonged and apparently irredeemable relationship which is destructive of a person’s dignity as a human being.'  James E. Faust Ensign, May 1993

He then goes on to state this from the same talk:

'At the same time, I have strong feelings about what is not provocation for breaking the sacred covenants of marriage. Surely it is not simply “mental distress,” nor “personality differences,” nor having “grown apart,” nor having “fallen out of love.” This is especially so where there are children.

....

In my opinion, members of the Church have the most effective cure for our decaying family life. It is for men, women, and children to honor and respect the divine roles of both fathers and mothers in the home.  '

I would add to President Faust that if you are a mother or a father and you do not respect your divine role as such, that you can change and there is help for you if you truly want to change.  I know because I have found that help.

Another Funny Bruce...

Jared, Bruce (3 years old) and I were driving down the freeway the other day in our new little Saturn car.  Bruce is sitting in his booster seat in the back seat.  So... Bruce burps and says, "My mouth has bad gas."  LOL  Here he is with cute Vanessa.  This picture is a little old, but still so cute.

Our Search For Happiness

I love to find meaningful expressions that cause me to ponder and think.  I love this one that Apostle James E. Faust quoted in a speech he gave some years ago.  The speech is called Our Search For Happiness

'In the story The Little Prince, the fox was wiser than he knew when he said, "Now here is my secret, a very simple secret: It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye" (Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, The Little Prince, trans. Katherine Woods [New York: Harcourt, Brace and World, 1943], 70). '


How true!  We can only see right when we look with our hearts!  Of course, if you have spiritual heart problems, or diseases, you won't see anything rightly.  But what is most beautiful about that is that you can go to the Savior of the world to be cured of such heart problems and diseases!  I know this is true!

Electric Blanket

After 2 months of Jared watching me hide under my covers in order to get warm, he had had enough.  He went out today and bought an electric blanket for me.  He said, "I can't stand watching you freeze over there anymore."  Ahhh, how sweet!  I took a nap with it today, and WOW what a difference!  I'm with you Kimi, and I'll be warming up under this blanket from now on.

For Pie Lovers

We are pie lovers around here and I'm hoping to give this recipe a try in the near future.  Thanks to http://leslieland.com/blog/ for the recipe.

PROCESSOR SOUR CREAM PIE CRUST

It’s not only fast, it’s also extremely tender while still being much flakier than the usual wham-bam processor pastry doughs.
It’s not quite as flaky as Rough Puff (below; if you look intently at the picture you’ll see RP has many more layers) and it’s so tender it can sog under the weight of a lot of juicy fruit. But even then it doesn’t sog badly.

And that same tenderness – aka undeveloped gluten – makes it behave itself when being pre-baked for custard and chiffon pies like Mamie Eisenhower’s Pumpkin Pie. Although it softens quickly at room temperature, that’s not a problem if you roll it out between sheets of waxed paper. Should it start looking greasy and slack, just throw the whole sandwich in the fridge until it firms up again.

For 2 (9 inch) crusts:
2 c. all purpose flour
1 tsp. sugar
½ tsp. salt
½ lb. cold butter
1/3 to ½ c. sour cream

1. Put flour, sugar and salt in a processor fitted with the steel blade. Pulse to mix.
2. Cut the butter into 10 or 12 pieces, drop them into the flour mixture and stir (I use a table knife) to coat each piece with flour.
3. Pulse until you have coarse but relatively even meal.
4. Dollop on the smaller amount of sour cream and pulse about 10 times. If the dough has started clumping together, you’re good. If there’s no sign of cohesion, add a bit more sour cream before pulsing again. Divide the clumpy material into 2  piles, placing each on a sheet of plastic wrap. Use the plastic to gently nudge the dough into a disc. Wrap in the plastic and chill at least 4 hours before rolling out.

Note: The basics of this recipe are in no way original to me, but there’s no knowing who first thought of combining the  bit of sour (classically vinegar), to inhibit gluten formation and the use of cream for moistening, which ups the fat content.

Cross sections of piecrust cookies: Sour Cream is at the top, Rough Puff underneath

REVERSE ROUGH PUFF PASTRY

This is not classic “rough puff paste,” a genuine pastry recipe that’s almost as much of a pain to make as real deal puff paste itself. Instead, it’s an old fashioned pie crust and puff paste, discovered years ago when I tried a piecrust recipe that had too much fat in it. Not wishing to waste all that butter, lard and washing of the processor, I rolled out the over-rich pastry on a heavily floured surface, sprinkling it with flour at frequent intervals and turning it over from time to time.
Then I folded it. One time (see instructions). Chilled, rolled and chilled again. Voila – flakes! – not nearly as many as puff pastry but still plenty enough. RRP isn’t as tender as sour cream pastry or as light as true puff paste but it’s better than either one for old fashioned double crust fruit pies. The number of steps makes it look time-consuming and complicated. It isn’t.

For 2 (9-10 inch crusts)
2 oz ( ¼ c.) cold lard*
5 oz (10 tbl.) cold butter
1 ½ tsp.lemon juice
½ c. ice water
2 ½ c. all purpose flour
½ tsp. salt
1. Cut the butter and lard into roughly tablespoon-sized pieces. Refrigerate until firm again.
2. Put a wide, shallow mixing bowl in the fridge to chill. Mix the lemon juice with the water and put it in the fridge too. In a processor with the metal blade, pulse 2 c. of the flour and salt to mix.
3. Distribute the fat bits over the flour and stir ( I use a table knife ) to more or less coat each piece with flour.
4. Pulse briefly, just until the fats are in baby lima to pea sized lumps. Transfer the mixture to the chilled bowl.
5. Pour in the water, making a circle about an inch in from the sides of the bowl. Using a fork or your fingertips, toss the mixture until it (mostly) clumps; there will probably be some unincorporated material.
6. Set out 2 large sheets of plastic wrap and put half of the the proto-dough on each. Use the plastic to gently nudge the disparate elements into a tight heap. Wrap tightly and chill at least 4 hours.
7. Remove a heap from the fridge and let it warm up for 10 minutes or so. It should now be willing to coalesce. Using the plastic wrap, manipulate it into a rough rectangle.
8. Sprinkle a work surface with half of the remaining flour and put the dough on it. Press to embed some flour, turn it over and press again. Roll out about 1/8 inch thick, turning and flouring lightly as you go. There will probably be a little flour left over.
9. Fold the dough the long way into thirds, top over center, bottom over top. Fold in the sides by thirds, one over the center, the other on top of it. Wrap in plastic and refrigerate. Repeat with remaining dough and flour.
Pictures below: Left – Dough with big fat lumps just starting to be rolled out. Right – Folded and ready to chill.

10. Chill at least 12 hours before rolling out between sheets of waxed paper; then chill again at least an hour, still in the paper,  before fitting it into the pan or making the cheese straws or whatever. All that manipulation makes the dough elastic and if it doesn’t get time to relax the pastry will be tough.

* About that lard: When it’s the real thing, carefully rendered, pure white, solid and innocent of preservatives, this unique fat is unbeatable for making classic piecrust. In addition to enhancing flakiness, good lard adds a subtle, toasty  note that gives depth to the crust flavor. Alas, it’s not easy to find, and the processed lard in boxes in supermarkets isn’t an adequate substitute. Somehow it’s even greasier-tasting than solid shortening, with a whiff of pig thrown in. If good lard eludes you, use all butter; make sure it’s high-fat European style and put in an extra tablespoon.

Reverse Rough Puff scraps in use

Concerning the make-ahead part promised in the last post:
ALL pie crust is (or should be) make-ahead. Standard recipes are always on about chill this and chill that and don’t work it etc. etc. and all of these things are worth paying attention to. But one of the most important – and easiest! – ways to ensure tenderness in piecrust is to let the newly-made dough have a good rest before you roll it out. Tightly wrapped, pie dough keeps in the refrigerator for 3 or 4 days and it freezes very well so there’s no excuse for rushing it.

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Changes

We recently sold Jared's truck.  Jared had a mix of feelings as he sold it.  He was sad and happy, and melancholy all at the same time.  He has gone through so many changes the last few years and with the sale of this truck it was like the last string cut from his job at his Dad's gravestone company.

On the other hand, I am relieved.

This van is sold as well.  It was good to us over the last 10 years.

We bought a navy blue Suburban which seats 8 of us comfortably.  It is a gas guzzler though.
We also bought a silver Saturn which is a small economy car.  We're told it can get up to 40 miles per gallon of gasoline on the highway.  We'll see.

Debt

I subscribe to a news brief that shows the numbers our nation is facing in debt.  Notable, that is for sure.

The Coming Fiscal Cliff:

National figures:

* U.S. Tax revenue: $2,170,000,000,000

* Fed budget: $3,820,000,000,000

* New debt: $ 1,650,000,000,000

* National debt: $14,271,000,000,000

* Recent budget cuts: $ 38,500,000,000

Let’s remove 8 zeros and pretend it's a household budget:

*Annual family income: $21,700

*Money the family spent: $38,200

*New debt on the credit card: $16,500

*Outstanding balance on the credit card: $142,710

* Total budget cuts so far: $38.50

Haircut and Choir

I got my haircut on my birthday on Tuesday.  It's a big change and I'm still getting used to it.  Last night at the Ward Christmas party everyone thought I had my hair in a ponytail.  It was funny when I turned my head, they would stop our conversation dead in its' tracks to mention my haircut.  I should have done this a long time ago.  My hair used to take so much time to do in the morning.  I would avoid going swimming and things like that just so I wouldn't have to re-do my long hair.

Last week Eric had his choir performance.  Here is the only picture I got of him.  He loves to sing and he has a good voice.  I hope he keeps taking choir all throughout his schooling.

Yummy

So Bruce comes up to Jared and says, "Dad, do you want a yummy?"  Jared looks in Bruce's hand and sees an olive, then looks in Bruce's mouth and sees his mouth full of yummy's.  Then Jared says, "Sure, I'll have a yummy."  Bruce then holds out his hand and hands Jared the olive.

Cutest little 3-year old we know.

BYU Football Game With The Sullivans

                               Joseph with his friend Jason, Provo, Utah
                                         

                                    Eric and Joseph

                          Eric, Joseph, and Caden Sullivan at the football game                  

                      Joseph and Jason Sullivan on the car ride home

Eric and Joseph had the rare privilege of going to a BYU football game in Provo a month ago with our neighbors, the Sullivans, who had extra tickets.  They had a blast.  The family they went with invited them to stay overnight in Provo.  It had snowed and so the stadium was pretty empty.  But the boys got to build a snow fort during the game.

Brigham City Temple

                         Thank you to the nice elderly man who took our family picture!

We went to the Brigham City Temple Open House in the middle of September.  What an awesome experience!  This is our temple.  Our temple used to be the Logan, Utah temple, which is a 25-30 minute drive through the Wellsville, Utah mountains, but now we only have to drive 20 minutes to Brigham City to get to the nearest temple.  Yeah!

Warm Feet

In the winter months, it is not uncommon for me to get chilled in the evenings.  My feet are my biggest problem with this malady.  As I crawl into bed for the night, I often have to crawl back out of bed because my feet are so cold that I can't fall asleep.  And if by chance I do fall asleep, I awaken several times because my body is working so hard to warm itself.  I'll wake up sweaty and even more chilled, only to have to crawl into a hot tub of water.

So, I've learned to just get up and go sit in a hot tub of water for 20 minutes until my body is warmed through.

That was until 5 nights ago....

And this is why I am writing this post.

I have found another faster way to get warm.  And it doesn't require me getting into a hot tub of water.

I get into bed, pull the blankets over my head and create a 'furnace' under the covers.  I breathe under the blankets for as long as I can stand, all the while my entire body is completely covered.  When I feel suffocated, I uncover my mouth only, and breathe the fresh air outside of the covers, while still remaining completely covered.  Within 5 minutes my hands have warmed up, and I fall asleep.

No more waking up shivering and sweaty.  No more frozen feet.  No more late night baths.

I have done this the last 5 nights with the exact same results.  It is a miracle.  

I had often wondered if I were to ever lose my access to hot water, how I would warm up and fall asleep.  Now I know!

Judgement

"While you should be friendly with all people, select with great care those whom you wish to have close to you. They will be your safeguards in situations where you may vacillate between choices, and you in turn may save them." - Gordon B. Hinckley

Amen!  Close friends influence you.  And you influence them.  Make sure you choose your close friends very carefully.  Make sure you have excellent judgement so that you never, ever lead them astray.  If you don't have excellent judgement, get it.

I watched an interview where Apostle Quentin L. Cook and his wife were interviewed.  At the end of the interview, Sister Cook was asked what advice she might give to those women who weren't married, but who were seeking a mate.  She said something to the effect of finding a man who has excellent judgement.  She said that Quentin has always had excellent judgement and she has been blessed because of it.

Imagine it?  Marriage to a man who has the ability to see easily right from wrong and thereby live his life according to it.

My own judgement has been awful for most of my life.  I am seeking the gift of excellent judgement and the Lord is giving to me.  It is a gift worth seeking out.   Of course, my husbands judgement has been awful too.  Thank the Lord for redemption and the chance to change!